I’d like to know why women in New Zealand (and possibly the world over) have to fight to be heard when it comes to health issues that effect us as females?
Speaking from personal experience, over the past 4 years it has been reinforced to me time and time again that, as a women, I have to repeat, nag, complain and shout to be heard! Why?? and at what cost does this level of ignorance from the medical profession continue?
My experience has been the catalyst for this post… it was one of the toughest times in my life and theres been many!
It started with me and what I wanted for my birth story, which was to ask for a cesarean section. This was due to my age and the risk to me as an older mother and my history. This was not enough for the medical professionals, even though I had done my research and decided what was best for me emotionally and physically, I had to reiterate my decision time and time again to my obstetrician and midwife, not to even mention the fight I had to have for medication to stop the 9 months of vomiting 🤷♀️
Why did I as a pregnant women have to be continually questioned? At points I questioned my own mind as I was asked so much.
I knew the risks, I have delivered naturally before, I had researched and discussed with the health professionals and was not ignorant to the recovery etc.
So why force me to keep telling you my decision as to how I want to treat with my body? When did I lose the right to tell you as a Dr or Specialist what I know about my body and mind? After all it is still mine right?
I had adhesions attached to my bowel after my cesarean section and I ended up living in pain for almost 2 years, I was unable to slide or swing with my toddler and no one could understand why, not one of the specialists, out of the many I saw (on recommendation from my GP), could understand it or put together that it was due to my cesarean?
I was treated by these professionals as though I was making it up and it was all in my head. So for 2 years I had to miss work, and have many visits to A&E, I ended up there atleast 10times and I constantly felt like I was the one who was wrong, that it must be in my head because these learned medical professionals kept telling me I was fine?
So what do you do?
I was advised by a Physiotherapist that it was perhaps my back and saw a surgeon there who said my back was fine.
I was advised by a Gastroenterologist that it was much to early after my cesarean to have any adhesions, so it couldn’t possibly be that. I saw this specialist twice, because I pushed for a second appointment and kept questioning on my own. He still said it couldn’t be adhesions.
And finally I was referred to a Pain Specialist who just decided it was there forever and I should live with it but here are some stretches you can do.
Not really a great outcome considering my quality of life.
Then finally 2 years later, after a lot of research, money spent exhausting other options and, talking with friends openly about my plight and their experiences, did I finally get recommended from a friend to go and see her Dr. So i personally booked to see this Gynecologist who immediately diagnosed adhesions and booked my surgery to remove them.
Finally pain free!
To add to my thoughts on the New Zealand GP and doctors ability to listen, after the above surgery, I once again felt like I was going crazy!
I started to lose my hair, was unable to lose any weight (even though I was on a low calorie diet and was doing a significant amount of walking and excercise), My periods were all over the place, 50, 75, 98 day cycles! after 40 years of being regular as clockwork!
My moods were back to that of a 17year old learning to deal with their PMS, I wasn’t sleeping and had night sweats that were horrific! And most sadly, even though I love him dearly, I was ready to leave my partner. It was a nightmare!
I knew in my mind something was wrong, so off I went back to the GP to get some help and I genuinely felt like I was just dismissed.
All I wanted was help, but I had to explain it all, time and time again to different GPs and I had to spend another long journey fighting to be heard!
The timeframe from walking into the GP at the beginning of this second journey to being officially diagnosed as being in Menopause at 40, was about 9 months.
On day one I said to my GP “I think its hormonal, could it be Menopause?”
The GP told me I was too young, it was too early, sent me to have a breast exam, ultrasounds etc. but refused to believe it could be menopause.
Again I’d like to question, why? When I know my body and kept saying to all of these people I think its Hormonal??? Even when I was referred to a specialist for this he too didn’t want to treat me because it could be fine…. it wasn’t fine.
And again it was my knowledge and the fact that I had made contact with the wonderful Gynecologist, who did listen, that I managed to get treatment and get sorted with MRT.
I am not the only story like this… after opening up about my womens issues I have heard stories from all types of women who have been told everything under the sun…
“You’re just over reacting”
“You seem to be coping with the symptoms fine, you dont need help”
“You’re too young to be menopausal”
“Your quality of life seems ok, so we won’t need to do anything”
“Let’s just wait 3 months and see what happens”
“Do you think you’re just depressed?”
“Are you stressed?”
Why? Why? WHY! are we not listened too when it comes to our own bodies?! It drives me absolutely insane and I think the medical profession needs to do something about it. Surely there’s more then one great Gynecologist in New Zealand!
If you are a medical professional reading this then I urge you to please listen, be open to the fact that women know their own bodies and mind, and maybe theres some truth in what they’re saying to you when they come in with their “hair brained” ideas about whats going on for them.
And if you like me are still searching for answers. Keep going, They’re out there and you can get help.
If you’re interested in my journey then please reach out, I’m happy to talk about my journey with anyone if I can try and help.
One foot in front... 